The only parts worth saving from what I've worked through thus far are the intangibles, the world-building. And even that, I've had to revamp substantially.
Yes, this is the Notorious Story, the one I've been working through, endless revisions and rewrites, for the past two decades. Because there's a story worth telling in it, and it only needed my maturation as a writer to tell it correctly. And through all that, I've refused to give up on it entirely. Could not bring myself to discard the gem at the center, that deserved more than I was, until now, capable of giving it.
And so the story of a Mary-Sue on a journey of self-discovery transforms into a dark tale of a man's pain and healing.
And a generous heaping of m/m smut. Of course.
I am incapable of writing a story without that. Perhaps it is just my current perception, the wide expanse of potential on the plateau where I currently rest. But I think it's more the path I've chosen, forging off the well-worn road that others cling to. On the rare occasions when I read a het romance these days, I find the story limiting, the characters cramped. I cannot tell you how many books I've read over recent years, how many strong male characters I've enjoyed getting to know, only to be disappointed by their lust for a female lead, when the male supporting character had so much more potential. Was so much more intriguing.
C'est la vie. Men do this all the time, I think. For any number of reasons. Perhaps one day the stigma will fall away, be discarded by society as a whole.
I find myself writing in order to facilitate just that. Love comes in all shapes and sizes, and to deny its potential simply because the vessel isn't what your narrow view perceives as acceptable... Bah.
At some point in the next week, I'll be sitting down with Black and doing that interview. The pacing of the series must needs change a bit, but I've not by any stretch abandoned it. Instead of doing one aspect a week, one muse a month, it may end up being one aspect a month, or at the most two a month. Just too much going on in my silly little head to remember to do things more often than that, sadly.
And after Black?
I think I might introduce you to Jaedyn. He's gone from being the fleeting secondary character, the sibling of the lead, to totally stealing the show. It's been a long journey, and he doesn't look all that pleased with the attention, but I think you'll enjoy getting to know him along with me.
Here's to endings that lead to fresh beginnings. Death that leads to even more vibrant life.