Skip to main content

Oh, the Agony.

Back from my three-day mini-vacation. Which was (of course!) interrupted by an email with the cover art for Dark Edge of Honor. Not the final, just a proof… I'll share it as soon as I can, promise. My first order of the day, since the gears weren't turning enough to actually engage the muses at all, was to take a look at the promo content needed for the release.

Writing a promo blog entry for the up and coming release will be about as pleasant as drafting a ten-part executive report outlining five recommendations for business model improvement. I guess this is where my lauded education will make or break me… About damn time I put the worthless thing to good use, I guess.

I have decided that writing an author bio is as painful as writing a synopsis. Only, I've fewer words to do it with, no idea what will pique the audience's interest… and how many readers will pay it the slightest bit of mind, anyways? It's not like my life story is a riveting plot. I can't even go so far as to call it a stimulating screw. Or a locking washer.

Seriously. Who reads author bios. Who remembers what's in them, five minutes later? There's little about me that's all that interesting, for starters. I could make shit up… does anyone truly fact-checks these things? Maybe I should have a humor columnist ghost-write my bio for me.

"Make them laugh, in a 'Red Green Show' meets 'Princess Bride' clusterfuck kinda way."

Because really. When it comes to this whole authorship thing, I have about as much of an idea of what I'm doing as Red Green does. 'Gimme duckkie tape, aikken fix it, eh.'

Everyone knows duct tape fixes everything.

…You should see my keyboard.

Comments

  1. Author Bio: I rock, that is all you need to know.

    There. I helped. ;-p

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Anonymous commenting is enabled. However, I reserve the right to censor content that is not civil and respectful. Discussions are welcome and encouraged. Attacking is not.

Popular posts from this blog

And the Rainbow Award for Best Gay Futuristic/Sci-Fi Goes To...

*clears throat* Drum roll, please. In a three-way tie for first place, Dark Edge of Honor. My thanks to Aleks Voinov the Best Co-Author Ever (and CONGRATS too, Darth Vader -- you rock), Deb Nemeth the Editor of Awesome, and all the very professional staff at Carina Press. Cue the Snoopy Dancing, Streamers, Confetti Parade and Sundry Noisemakers.

Meet the Muses: Origin: Mike

Mike is my character from the soon-to-be-released 'Dark Edge of Honor.' I’ve been acquainted with a number of different veterans and soldiers through the years, but there was one specifically—a person I don’t know, and never met—that sparked the beginnings of this story and was the avatar of the spirit behind him. Late in 2009, I stumbled rather deliberately upon the website of photojournalist Michael Yon and delved into the dispatches from his 2005 embed with deployed troops in Iraq. One of them stopped me in my tracks. Entitled “Gates of Fire,” (click here for the link to Yon's full dispatch) it recounted an incident involving the Deuce Four’s Lt. Colonel Kurilla and Command Sergeant Major Prosser which Yon witnessed, camera in hand.

My Mini-Vacation

I'm taking all of next week off from my regular day-job so that I can celebrate DEoH's release-- Snoopy-Dancing and Grinning Like an Institutionalized Loon. Without scaring the customers. It's not really  a vacation, because I'm still working, after a fashion. If it were a real vacation, I wouldn't be staying at home, that's for sure. If I could take a real  week's vacation, I'd be here: Best View Ever, Bora Bora Hammock. However, I'm not. I'm in my little writer corner all week long, availing myself to fans and readers and bloggers and such, doing all the marketing and promo stuff that a good little author does. [Yes, Good Little Author. Pat me on the head and give me a cookie now!] But I think I'll keep this picture handy. As my desktop background or something, perhaps. Because, woohoo, that's gorgeous ain't it? They have restaurants with extreme al fresco dining, where the tables and chairs are in the water. One d...